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I Used to Say No to Feminism: Poem Reflection

Updated: Mar 11, 2020

She's bound by the imaginary world of debt.

Her potential is held down by pounds of invisible weights.

She is told to be extraordinary while facing unearthly feelings and obstacles of man-made infliction... All while expected to LIVE.

And we ask what has this world come to?

The world makes it seem as if a woman must always choose.

When mothers must choose between a career and her children yet will be

judged regardless of her choices.

“She neglects her child's emotional needs” or “she gave into the patriarchy”

“She does not have time for her child” or “It’s a shame she gave it all up for kids- she had so much potential.”

I thought we had choices in the 21st century.

Why can't we choose both without the repercussions?

The world makes a woman justify herself.

A world where a woman must justify why marriage and/or children are in or out of her plans.

Where a woman must justify her career path.

A world where a woman must justify why she wears or does not wear makeup.

Where a woman must justify how she dresses and how she wears her hair.

A world where a woman must justify why she was wearing what she wore when she was abused.

Where a woman must justify why she took the lit path home that added ten minutes to her walk that night.

A world where a woman must justify why women spaces are important.

Where a woman must justify her injustices on, and on, and on.

Where a woman must justify why she is so fed up with explaining herself.

Why must you question her?

Can we let people breath when all they want is equality.

Push and Pull - 2017, edited in 2020.


It is funny, I just deleted my previous reflection because of the point of this poem: I am tired of explaining myself when it comes to being a woman who is a feminism. I'm tired of the "But not all men..." WELL, "but not all feminists" or the "that's anti-fem because...".

What I will say is I rejected feminism for a long time because I was scared of people's perception of me for defining as one. One bias I held was that people would think I was a man hater, who wanted women to take over all facets of the world. I also felt a pull and push within the community about what a true feminist is, conflicting with my own thoughts and beliefs. The reality is, I believe in equality for all, women and men, neither being superior to the other. I am a feminist. I know what my feminism looks like, and I know what my feminism does not look like. I realize the ideology has become diluted to some, but all I can do is continue to educate myself and stay true to the values I hold within the movement and remain dynamic in my journey. What I can no longer do, is hide my feminism because of the sensitivities of others. Although, my writing journey aims to give alternative perspectives and education for those who are interested, today, I am unapologetic.

Today, I am tired of explaining what it is like to be a woman and a feminist in 2020.

Thanks for the photo by IG: @ash.linden, edited by me.

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